Saturday, March 29, 2008

Dustin Diamond (2008 Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp Appearance - Episode II)

Episode II - March 20, 2008

The second episode of Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp began with the show's contestants riding on a bus at 6:50 AM out to the boot camp designed by drill instructor Harvey Walden. In the opening scene, this season's contestants expressed their fears about what was going to transpire as the day unfolded.

Dustin Diamond, the primary focus of this episode recap, was apparently incredibly frightened and mentioned during the bus ride, "I'm probably gonna need my hand held throughout the whole thing." Diamond apparently wishes he had a father figure on the show to protect him from any type of physical exertion, much like his good buddy Dennis Haskins probably used to do on the Saved By The Bell set.

Next, all of the contestants lined up according to their respective teams and were instructed to each deliberate in one of the boot camp trailers and vote for a team captain. Diamond's team was nonchalant about the process - nobody wanted to be the team captain. Eventually Tina Yothers and Willie Aames threw their support behind Diamond, apparently hoping that they would be able to nudge Diamond into giving a better effort than he did during his debacle on the 2007 season of Celebrity Fit Club.

About the team's decision to vote Diamond as captain, Willie Aames said, "I'm a little nervous about Dustin being captain of the team. I saw the footage last year. I was in shock [at Dustin's performance]."

Tina Yothers said, "For me, it was to keep him accountable. For not only all of us, but mainly for himself."

Diamond was elated about being voted team captain, presumably because he must have thought that he had earned his teammates' respect. In an interview, Diamond discussed being captain and began laying the groundwork for a future failure on the show by stating,

"Here's a chance for me to get out there and show ... you know, kind of like the underdog. You were pissed on last time and here's a chance for you to come back and show your own. ... I'll do what is required. But guess what, we're not fucking Marines."

Next, both teams reconvened outside and lined up for Harvey. Harvey asked each team who had been voted captain. When Diamond's team said that he was their captain, Harvey was in total shock. Harvey exclaimed, "[You nominated] his freaking Nazi ass??? You gotta be fucking kidding me. You all are pulling my leg right now."

Next, the contestants were taken to pugil stick battle where one member from each team battled one member from the other team with a pugil stick which standing on a balance beam. Diamond's team (the red) team battled against Brian Dunkleman's team (the blue team). Each team had two men and two women and each team member battles against one team member of the same sex on the opposing team. Diamond was teamed against A.J. Benza and was quickly defeated. Benza knocked Diamond off the balance beam in short order before accidentally falling off the beam himself. Diamond looked completely hapless during the competition and failed to hit A.J. even one time with his pugil stick.

After each team member had battled once, the score was even, 2-2, thereby forcing a tiebreaking match. The blue team chose Dunkelman. Shockingly, under Diamond's leadership, his red team chose Toccara Jones, a woman, to battle in the tiebreaking match.

Regarding the decision to battle, Toccara said, "We had to choose someone to break a tie, and I had just seen Dustin and Will [Aames] fight and they both got their butts kicked. So ok, I can do as good as you can at this point."

Diamond all but admitted that he has less masculinity than his character Screech from saved By The Bell. Regarding the decision to let Toccara battle, Diamond stated, "She's a strong girl and I think I'm the weakest of the red team."

In the tiebreaking match, Toccara was quickly defeated by Dunkelman. After the match, Harvey and A.J. gave Diamond crap for choosing Toccara instead of fighting the battle himself.

After the battle, the red team had to select the weakest link on their team to perform a chore for Harvey. Willie Aames was selected as the weakest link for the second straight episode, and was required to fill a bunch of empty sand bags up with sand and move them to a certain location. The rest of the members of the red team decided to stay and help Willie Aames complete this task.

In the next scene, both teams were shown eating dinner in a mess hall at the boot camp. After the dinner, Harvey instructed both team captains to create a personal training (PT) workout and then perform the workout. Brian Dunkelman quickly created a PT workout by essentially copying one of the workouts that Harvey had previously had them perform. Diamond, on the other hand, took his sweet time reading an exercise book for at least 20 minutes while the blue team performed Dunkelman's workout, causing Harvey to fly into a rage at Diamond's tardiness. Harvey yelled, "Dustin, get your ass out here!"

Harvey then made Diamond do some push-ups outside in the dirt. It appeared as though Diamond was incapable of performing even a single push-up without resting his knees on the ground. Harvey screamed,

"It wasn't an option for your team to work out! Dustin, you're shortchanging them by having a lack of fucking urgency to get the mission accomplished! You can't do it on your terms, Dustin ... it's not your game anymore!"

Diamond's red team was later shown performing the PT workout that Diamond had belatedly created. During the workout Diamond started lagging behind the rest of his teammates as a result of his weak and out-of-shape chunky body. Diamond tried to motivate his teammates, saying "Keep it going guys. Don't let my weakness be a sign of weakness for you guys." Immediately after finishing the workout, Diamond puked on the ground.

The next day, the team members from each team had to walk 2.4 miles up a gradual incline of a mountain while carrying the bags of sand that the red team had filled the previous day. Diamond looked to be incredibly winded during the hike, infuriating his teammate Toccara. In an interview after the event, Toccara said,

"Dustin was having issues with his legs, his arms ... I don't know. But I wanted him to man up and say I'm gonna do this. See, I'm a fighter and I'll get kicked off of Celebrity Fit Club because I will hit him."

After the teams reached the end of the hike, Harvey informed everyone that they were going to run back down the mountain to the boot camp. Erin Moran was having medical issues at this point, presumably because she actually did hurt herself during a pugil match with the much larger Toccara during the previous day's competition. When Diamond learned that Erin Moran was going to sit out the run, Diamond saw his opening to also sit out the run. Diamond started to pretend that his quadriceps muscle was injured and claimed that he was unable to run. Diamond said,

"The job is to run. Now if the only way to get Harvey off your back is to have an injured muscle, then I need to sit this one out. Put me out coach its ... it hurts. My quad is tore up. I'm gonna push hard for you, but I'm not gonna permanently injure myself. Maybe I should get it checked out by the medic."

The Celebrity Fit Club medic did examine Diamond's quadriceps, but was unable to determine whether he was actually injured and agreed that it might be a good idea to let Diamond sit out the run. Harvey was not pleased with Diamond's wimpy excuse, saying "Typical Dustin. I'm not surprised."

After Diamond's whining, Tina Yother's said that Diamond need to "man up" and Willie Aames said that Diamond's excuse was a bunch of "b.s." Diamond didn't seem to care that he let down his teammates, saying "I don't think I need to kill myself to get in shape."

Finally, the various contestants reconvened after the run for the second episode's weigh-in. The final weigh-in included quite a bit of drama, as Toccara exploded when told that she needed to lose more weight. Diamond's weigh-in, on the other hand, was relatively tame. Diamond weighed in at 209 lbs, a loss of 8 lbs from the first weigh-in. Harvey gave Diamond crap for the decision to let Toccara fight Dunkelman in the pugil match. Diamond replied that his decision was the correct one and again referred to himself as the weakest link on his own team.

***Be sure to check out my other Dustin Diamond entries:
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode I
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode III
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode IV
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode V
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode VI
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode VII
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode VIII

Dustin Diamond - (2007 Celebrity Fit Club Appearance)
Dustin Diamond - The Early Years
Dustin Diamond (2000-Present)

Sunday, March 16, 2008

Dustin Diamond (2008 Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp Appearance - Episode I)

Episode I - March 13, 2008

The first episode of Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp began with two buses carrying the Fit Club contestants to a boot camp designed by drill instructor Harvey Walden. This season pits four previous contestants against four new contestants. The four previous contestants are Dustin Diamond, Tina Yothers, Toccara Jones, and Willie Aames. The new contestants are Erin Moran, Sommore, A.J. Benza, and Brian Dunkleman.

The mere fact that Diamond is appearing on this season of Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp after his obnoxious behavior on Season 5 of the show, tells me that Diamond must really be hard up for publicity and cash. During the final episode of last season, Diamond had stated, “I would rather eat a turd than come back to another Fit Camp. It doesn’t even have to be a human turd … just a turd.” For whatever reason, Diamond did decide to reappear on the show and took the bus ride to the boot camp.

Dustin Diamond looked chubby as he stepped off the bus. He had adopted a preppy look and was wearing an argyle sweater. Diamond sported an enormous “Grizzly Adams” beard that was unkempt and growing out of control. Diamond’s beard resembled that of a stereotypical Al Qaeda terrorist and was in desperate need of a trimming. As he walked past Harvey Walden, he attempted to pat Harvey on the back and was violently shoved away, much to Diamond’s surprise.

Harvey made everyone line up and answer questions about why they had come to the boot camp. Harvey said to Diamond, “Dustin freakin’ Diamond! I don’t know why you’re getting a second chance. But the question is, what are you going to do with it? … Just so we understand each other, I still don’t fucking like you!

Diamond appeared to be in disbelief at Harvey’s outburst. Diamond appeared to be shocked and scared at this moment.

Next, the new contestants competed against the old contestants in a military-style obstacle course. The picture below is of Diamond after running the course. At first glance, one might assume that Diamond did follow through on his threat to eat a turd before appearing on Celebrity Fit Club. However, the brown stains on his shirt are actually from crawling around in mud. In one section of the obstacle course, each team member had to crawl through wet mud underneath a net. When Diamond emerged on the other side of the net, Diamond was coated in the wet mud.

Another obstacle in the course was an angled log that each team member had to run up. Diamond was shown clumsily falling off the log during his turn to run up it.

Not surprisingly, Diamond’s red team lost the competition, although Tina Yothers’ glacial pace during the event was the reason for the loss. Despite Yothers’ slowness, Willie Aames was voted “Dead Weight” by his team-members and was required to carry a ton of bricks in a wheelbarrow from one side of the boot camp to the other. Diamond graciously helped Aames cart the bricks in an apparent effort to get on his teammate’s good side.

After lugging the bricks, all of the team members congregated in a mess hall where a dinner was provided. The dinner was vegan and consisted of raw food. Nobody was too pleased with the food, and Diamond explained, based on his apparent vast knowledge of fecal odors, “Have you ever smelled a vegan fart? They’re horrible.

During the next morning, everyone was awoken at 6:00 AM for some drill exercises and Harvey really got on Diamond’s case. At one point, everyone was supposed to run around a small circle, and the out-of-shape Diamond started walking. The following exchange occurred between Diamond and the angry Harvey Walden:

“Harvey: Dustin, why are you walking?
Diamond: Because I’m in pain.
Harvey: Do you think you’re the only one suffering?
Diamond: No.
Harvey: Look around Dustin. They’re running circles around you. I knew you shouldn’t have been here! Why don’t you just quit now and stop wasting both our times!”

Later on in the day, everyone gathered at a different meeting room for the first weigh-in. Diamond weighed in at 217 lbs, exactly the same weight he carried at the beginning of Season 5. During his weigh-in, Dr. Ian Smith, the show’s nutritionist, told Diamond, “Dustin, I wish I could say I’m happy you’re back. But I’ve gotta be honest with you, I’m not happy you’re back. It was a complete displeasure to work with you last season.

When Diamond blamed his rude behavior during last season on the other contestants, Stacey Kaiser, the show’s psychologist, place the blame on Diamond, saying, “You didn’t get along with the rest of the cast because you acted like an ass and so far you’re getting along with [your new team members] because you’re smiling and being complimentary and stroking people’s hair. .. Two days of kind behavior does not erase 100 days of misery.

During this exchange, Erin Moran asked whether Diamond was also nice at the beginning of last season. Erin Moran looked shocked and dismayed when informed that Diamond was the same way last season.

Finally, Harvey Walden was given a chance to critique Diamond. Harvey said,

“You’re doing the same thing you did last time. You know, you befriend them and then you’re a fucking snake in the grass. You don’t give a rat’s ass about them. … Unlike my colleagues, there is no fucking clean slate with me. If your Nazi ass was on fire, I wouldn’t even fucking piss on you. … As of right now, you can kiss my fucking yellow ass. Right now, I don’t give a rat’s ass about you… He’s so full of shit.”

Diamond’s body fat % and weight were subsequently displayed and he was shown wearing a shirt and Speedos in camouflage colors. Diamond grabbed his crotch in an apparent attempt to be funny. Shortly after this scene, the episode ended.

***Be sure to check out my other Dustin Diamond entries:
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode II
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode III
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode IV
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode V
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode VI
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode VII
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode VIII

Dustin Diamond - (2007 Celebrity Fit Club Appearance)
Dustin Diamond - The Early Years
Dustin Diamond (2000-Present)

Dustin Diamond (2008 Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp Appearance)

As you have probably already heard, Dustin Diamond is appearing on the sixth season of Celebrity Fit Club. This season is entitled Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp. Diamond previously appeared on Season 5 of the show and was univerally hated for his asinine behavior.

I assume that Diamond must be really hard-up for money, because he said the following during the final episode of last season: “I would rather eat a turd than come back to another Fit Camp. It doesn’t even have to be a human turd … just a turd.

Diamond is the most pathetically washed up celebrity of his generation, so I have decided to post episode recaps from this season, as I am certain that Diamond will eventually manage to piss off quite a few people with his boorish behavior.

Be sure to check back periodically, as I will provide an episode summary after each episode of the show. My summaries will be focused on Diamond's actions on the show as well as his interactions with other cast-members.

Episode I Summary
Episode II Summary
Episode III Summary
Episode IV Summary
Episode V Summary
Episode VI Summary
Episode VII Summary
Episode VIII Summary

***Be sure to check out my other Dustin Diamond entries:

Dustin Diamond - The Early Years
Dustin Diamond (2000-Present)
Dustin Diamond (2007 Celebrity Fit Club Appearance)

Friday, March 14, 2008

Devon Sawa

Devon Sawa is a former child star best known for his movie roles in the movies Casper and Final Destination. Sawa was born on September 7, 1978 in Vancouver, British Columbia. Sawa began his career acting on stage when he was eleven. Three years later he became an advertising spokeschild for Kenner's Nerf Toys.

In 1992 he began appearing in a small role in The Odyssey, a Canadian fantasy series. Sawa subsequently had a larger role in KidZone, a Canadian docudrama about high school. Sawa began acting in movies as the quarterback in Little Giants (1994). In 1995, he appeared in two major motion pictures, Casper (Sawa played a living boy who became the ghost character) and Now and Then. Casper was a major success at the box office, earning $100 million in the U.S. and another $187 million internationally.

Sawa's mid-1990s movie roles made him a heartthrob and one of the most popular child actors of the time. Sawa appeared on the covers of many magazines aimed at pre-teens. According to these magazine covers, Sawa may also have had a gay relationship with fellow washed-up celebrity Jonathan Taylor Thomas:

Sawa's movie success continued through the late 1990s and into 2000. In 1999, he starred in Idle Hands, a horror movie about a boy whose right hand has a mind of its own and goes on a killing spree. Sawa followed up with a starring role in Final Destination in 2000, playing a boy who cheats death when he has a clairvoyant vision that an airplane on which he was to fly was going to explode. I personally liked Final Destination and thought that Sawa was a very good actor in it.

Sawa must have felt like he was on top of the world in 2000. At the young age of 22 he already had an impressive resume of movie roles and must have earned millions of dollars from his roles. He also appeared in the music video for Eminem's Stan in 2000. However, Sawa's star quickly faded after 2000 as he got in trouble with the law and stopped getting decent acting roles.

Sawa's legal troubles began in 2000 when he was arrested for public intoxication and disturbing the peace. In 2003, Sawa was convicted of driving with a blood alcohol level above California's legal limit of .08. In 2005, the police were called to Sawa's apartment when he was allegedly beating up his girlfriend. Apparently things got so dicey that a SWAT team broke into his apartment to rescue his girlfriend from him! Sawa was arrested for either resisting arrest or obstructing the duties of a police officer. (I heard a rumor that Sawa may have served a prison sentence for his crime, but I cannot confirm this information.)

Sawa also supposedly developed a nasty drug addiction that fueled his erratic behavior. His odd behavior and apparent anger management issues scared away movie producers. Sawa's only decent role since 2000 was in 2002's Extreme Ops, a poorly received action adventure flick. Sawa's youthful boyish look that helped him gain movie roles in his youth faded as he got older - now, he's nothing more than a 29-year-old man with a baby face, acne, and a very wide nose as shown in this recent photo:

As if his washed-up career and problems with the law weren't bad enough, Sawa may have also contracted herpes, as shown in the picture below:

For the reasons discussed above, there can be no doubt that Devon Sawa is one washed up celebrity!