Sunday, July 27, 2008

Zachery Ty Bryan

Zachery Ty Bryan is a former child star best known for his role as "Brad Taylor" for his role on the hit 1990s sitcom, Home Improvement.

Bryan was born on October 9, 1981 in Aurora, Colorado. He began his entertainment career appearing in print and television advertising. He later moved to California and was cast in 1991 in his break-through role as Brad Taylor on Home Improvement. Bryan was one of three child stars in the fictional Taylor family on Home Improvement. The other two were Jonathan Taylor Thomas (who played "Randy Taylor") and Taran Noah Smith (who played "Mark Taylor"). (Of the three child actors in the Taylor family, Bryan is the only one not hounded by homosexual rumors, despite what the picture on the lower right below might seem to imply.)





The Brad Taylor character was an athlethic-type kid who was also somewhat of a punk. He was also known for sporting a long mullet. During the first few seasons of Home Improvement, Brad and Randy would often gang up to make fun of their weirdo brother, Mark. Brad would also frequently act before thinking things through, causing him to often end up in trouble.

Home Improvement was a massive hit during its run from 1991-1998 and made Bryan a star and somewhat of a heartthrob. His role led to some subsequent roles in motion pictures, including roles in First Kid (1996), The Rage: Carrie 2 (1999), and The Fast & The Furious: Tokyo Drift (2006). His most memorable movie scene is perhaps one from First Kid in which Sinbad fired an enormous spitball at him:



Although he has managed to act in a number of small roles ever since Home Improvement went off the air, it is clear that the demand for Bryan has diminished substantially over the years. Wearing see-through shirts such as the one shown below certainly cannot be helping his career prospects.

Bryan's personal life is apparently somewhat hectic. In April 2008 he was staying at a Choice Hotel in San Diego when he allegedly went across the street to grab a Gatorade. When he returned, the hotel employees refused to let Bryan go upstairs to his room because the room was not reserved in his name. The hotel employees appear to have been under the assumption that Bryan was some kind of homeless vagrant when he returned to the hotel.

Bryan claims that hotel employees refused to let Bryan call up to the room to speak with his wife. This refusal apparently caused Bryan to fly off into a rage. In response to Bryan's behavior, a hotel employee whipped out a taser gun and tased Bryan in his neck. Bryan is currently suing Choice Hotels for $25,000 as a result of this embarrassing incident.

Although Bryan has appeared on a hit sitcom, became the "Spitball Kid" in a major motion picture, and has acted in several additional roles over the years, the fact that hotel employees automatically assumed that he was a homeless vagrant speaks volumes. Accordingly, there can be no doubt that Zackary Ty Bryan is one washed up celebrity!

46 comments:

Anonymous said...

Why was this show ever popular in the first place? The fact that all 3 of the kids are on your list should say something about the quality.

Anonymous said...

It was popular cause of Tim Allen & all the crazy antics that revolved not just around he & his family, but with Al & Wilson. The show was basic yet had more to it than meets the eye. All of these so called child actors serve their purpose for the show they were on at the time, then as they grow into young adults the cuteness ain't so cute anymore & the roles are less and less.

Cha-Ka said...

Him and the other washed-up former child actor/homos from Home Improvement should do a gay porn film together. They can call it "Gay Tool Time" and insert dildoes shaped like hammers and screwdrivers up their hungry and eager gay asses.

Anonymous said...

Wow a homeless vagrant, at least he's one step above Michael Oliver.

Keep up the great work on this site, i always pee my pants laughing

Anonymous said...

MMM... He is a step up from Taran, Step down from JT. Jonathan's in... what? College! So he does not have time for acting. I've read that Jonathan wants to direct and do a few roles or just give up acting altogether though.

Back to Zachery Ty. He is washed up. Though here's an excerpt from Wikipedia: 'He and his wife are working on a documentary with ESPN'. Other than that there does not seem to be anything that justifies the "not washed up celebrity to once famous child actor". I like Home Improvement, thought it was a great series, but individuals, these actors though I respect both (not this person though) there career has slowed down... and Taran has turned ugly.

BOTR said...

DUSTIN UPDATE

He's going to be writing a tell-all about his time on SBTB and all the backstage dirt. Click on my name for the story

TyPanitz - macshill said...

He has the head of a jack-o-lantern. I always thought so, but it's now even MORE apparent. What a dog! HA!

Anonymous said...

Aye, you never update this anymore.

Movie Fan said...

^^^ More profiles are pending. I've been very busy with my real job. I'll get some new posts up soon. Thanks for the support!

Anonymous said...

Zachery recently had a one-off role in Burn Notice. And he was looking rather healthy. I'd hardly say he's washed up.

Anonymous said...

this blog is hilarious!!!

Anonymous said...

Whoah! That's the '90s this kid wore a mullet in. Just like Saved by the Bell was in the '90s, despite their nausea inducing '80s wear.

Anonymous said...

Sure I'm having a good laugh at this site. Schadenfreud makes me pee my pants. But honestly isn't all this expected?

Child actors are there, cause their cute kids. (well with the exception of Tina Yothers, who was never cute, and Gary Coleman, who continued to play a kid as a grown up on Diff. Strokes.) Pauly Shore appealed to the '80s gen xers sense of humour. He rode a trend of eighties humour. Do we really expect them to outlive all this?

The question really is, why are they so effed up, and why didn't they save their money? Maybe there should be laws to protect them against greedy parents and managers?

The undersized thing is interesting too, and apparently a problem, even when they grow up to be good looking? And its so pronounced when you have these weird 20 and 30 somethings (icky icky Andrea Zuckerman hello!) playing teens. They never seem to go onto commercial acting success either.

Anonymous said...

you guys in here are all stupid!! your all talking shit on a show that was on the air ten years ago ! the show was obviously popular if it was on for ten years.find something else better to do with your lives !! GOD!

Anonymous said...

I was at a private party and he was there with his agent and a friend. They were doing a pile of coke on the table... and he kept saying it was going to be a break out year for him in major film... guess the coke got in the way... Reminds me of insane Corey Haim / and Feldman is a fuck too... but Corey's mind is a GONER... call him Plant or Osborne.

Anonymous said...

this dude is a manwhore in la sucking dick for nickels at the bus stop bathroom

Ass! Or cock! said...

He should play Patrick Swayze in a Lifetime biopic.

Anonymous said...

I saw Zachery at the truck stop bathroom in Boron Nevada, between Bakersfield and Las Vegas. He asked me if I had any blow and that he would suck my dick for a dollar.

Anonymous said...

What a beefcake lookin' dude

Anonymous said...

People need to stop leavin rude comments. I'm related to him. He's NOT gay. And there are sooo many washed up celebrities, it doesn't matter that he's one of them.

Anonymous said...

Damn this blog is mean. I enjoy the histories of these stars, but maybe add a dose of sympathy.

Anonymous said...

Zach was always a little bitch living in La canada, Ca.. Spoiled to the nines

He probally is sucking cock for nickles at the bus stop or licking a piece of foreskin at the bus stop bathroom

Anonymous said...

okay...apparently, he is a rapper who now lives in Montreal. true story.

John said...

Speaking of Sinbad... where is his entry on Washed Up Celebrities?

And Heidi Fleiss?

Anonymous said...

I just watched the syfy channel original movie... Thor: hammer of the gods...good ole zachery played Thor...see the coke didn't do him so wrong. Quality film indeed!

Anonymous said...

He Forgets his friends that were around since day one. Oh well, no big loss.

Anonymous said...

First of all I am from Ohio and am a proud Buckeyes and Browns fan. I went to high school with AJ Hawks brother and even though I haven't had the priveledge of meeting either of them, when someone from our hometown makes it big it makes us proud. As you may or may not know Zachery's cousin Laura Quinn who is Brady Quinn's sister is married to AJ and so that makes ZTB part of AJ's family, so I have to come to his defense not just because of that, but also because I am and always will be a devoted fan of his. I happen to think Zach is a very talented guy and while a lot of childstars get screwed up I think the fact that we have only ever heard of one incident which was pretty minor compared to what we hear about today when it comes to people like Charlie Sheen, Paris Hilton etc. If he was doing the stuff these idiots on here are saying we would know about it. The paparazzi does not discriminate whether you are a current star or a former childstar if you do something stupid it's going to get out and we are going to hear about it. I also highly doubt he is gay, the people who are claiming this only wish he was because they secretly wish it was them he was blowing. He is married and seems like a pretty normal guy to me and his wife is drop dead gorgeous. As far his him having a hard time getting roles, I think that Zach has had a pretty successful career and if he is struggling it isn't because he isn't talented or attractive. I've seen recent photos and saw him on Burn Notice and he looks fantastic! I did see that Thor movie and as cheesy as it may have been I was pretty impressed with his physique, I actually didn't recognize him. In case you haven't noticed talent is no longer a requirement anymore. The writers in Hollywood suck, there is not one movie out there right now I would pay a dime to see. We are plagued with rolemodels such as "Snookie" and the "Whoretrashians" and "Lady Gaga", these people are stealing the true talents in Hollywoods spotlight. Think about it even some of the great actors are struggling, where the heck is Anthony Hopkins? Are you going to call him a washed up actor? These un-talented losers are stealing their spotlight, it's all about scandal now, which proves the point I was trying to make earlier. If Zach was really doing all of the things you said he was he would probably be getting more parts. If you want to make it big and stay on top you need to either make a sex tape, get arrested, dress like a hooker, or your parents need to own a famous hotel. So, if you really want to criticize or bully anybody those are the people you should consider writing about.

Anonymous said...

this guy was actually a pretty badass soccer player growing up. was in the national pool a few times -- and not bc of his celebrity. i played against him all the time and he was a beast.

Justin said...

Does anyone remember when Carrie 2 was filming and Zacvery was in the tabloids for drinking & being a womanizer? Also, there were a few anonymous girls who commented on how well-hung he was.

Anonymous said...

I went to elementary school with him right before he got on that show. He was really nice and really smart. Im sure he remembers me, I was the only black girl in the class.

Anonymous said...

Yea, he was a good soccer player, heard about him thru other players, but he's still a kreepy dick sniffer, bring on the coke butt plug

J-star said...

You guys are all retarded. Every "washed-up" celeb has comments about getting fucked in the ass and getting loads blown on their face. What the hell is wrong with some of you, honestly.

Anonymous said...

Heard this guy did a dine and dash at a McDonalds in Arizona...

Anonymous said...

Forget about his mullet what about his bowl cut pulled back into a ponytail and how about he was passed as a leading role 4 Fast and Furious Tokyo Drift he's more washed up then a set of dishes at Denny's

Anonymous said...

I see a lot of people on here saying that he snorts blows sometimes if he does so what its coo I would snort some with him

Anonymous said...

Not all child actors continue with acting. I don't consider him washed up. I heard that he is currently focusing his attention on directing.

By the way i recently spoke with him and he charges $10 per ounce of cocaine. More if it's short notice.

Jessica I said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

I can promise all of you ZTB is doing pretty good for himself. Super nice guy who is enjoying staying behind the scenes producing. He has a SMOKIN hot wife and is pretty hard not to like.

Anonymous said...

I was an extra on home improvement and me and zach smoked a rock in the bathroom seemed like a nice guy.

Anonymous said...

Bryan seems to be doing well enough all things considered. I hope he doesn't read this blog, given the perverts who resent him for being straight.

Anonymous said...

Hung out with him a bit back in the day...real generous guy...always gave a reach around and cupped my ballz

WillyJohnWeiner said...

Hung out with this guy back in 07. Real nice guy. After i came in his ass he made me breakfast. Scrambled eggs and toast.

Anonymous said...

I would love for this guy to make my mouth a urinal. I would even buy him some dinner at Taco Bell as token of my appriciation.

Anonymous said...

The illiteracy and defective-human silence on this sight is beyond understanding. That such swill as these correspondents who live with us only reinforces the notion that the U.S. is a failed society of bottom-feeders.

Jeezus.

Jessica I said...

Brad was my favorite of the "Home Improvement" boys. I liked Randy and Mark, too, but he was my favorite. He now has a career behind the camera. Kudos to him for finding success outside of acting.

Terry McGee said...

Lucas Black knocked out Zach Ty on the set of Fast and Furious:Tokyo Drift. Supposedly Zach was mocking Lucas and his heavy Southern accent. Lucas became upset and punched Zach so hard that he fell onto a rare 1997 Hyundai Accent. In the process he damaged the 6 foot tall spoiler on the trunk. This ultra rare rice rocket belonged to a member of the Yakuza crime family of Japan. Zach refused to pay for the damage. The next day, a few Yakuza goons paid him a visit at his favorite McDonald's hangout. Zach was eating ten Big Mac hamburgers and three vanilla milkshakes. As he was eating his fifth Big Mac, a Yakuza goon bitch slaps Zach. Chewed Big Mac exits Zach's mouth and falls on to the shoes of the 6'3 goon. The huge Yakuza goon grabs Zach and tells him that if he does not pay for the damage to the ultra rare Hyundai he will be "dead". So Zach pulls out a huge wad of cash, to be exact the wad contained five thousand dollars! The goon takes the money, and the debt between Zach and the Yakuza is settled. To this very day, Zach poops in his pants when he hears the word "Yakuza".