Saturday, March 03, 2007

Scott Schwartz

Scott Schwartz is a former child star best known for his role as "Flick" in the 1983 sleeper hit movie A Christmas Story. Most people might not remember the name "Scott Schwartz," but they probably remember his character from the movie. Flick was the character that licked a frozen flagpole on a dare and his tongue froze to the flagpole. If you've seen the movie, I'm sure you remember that scene, as it is probably the most memorable one in the movie.






Like many former child stars, puberty was very harsh on Schwartz and basically killed his career. Schwartz stopped growing shortly after he reached 5 feet in height (according to his MySpace page he is 5"2' tall). Desperate to make a buck in the entertainment world Schwartz turned to porn when no regular acting roles were available. He appeared in movies such as Beauty and the Beast 2 (1990), Scotty's X-rated Adventure (1996), New Wave Hookers 5 (1997), The Wrong Snatch (1997) and Dirty Bob's Xcellent Adventures 35 & 36 (both 1997). He even won an AVN Award (the apparent porn equivalent to an Oscar) in 1997 for "Best Non-Sexual Performance" in Silver Screen Confidential (1996).

In 2000, he left the adult film industry entirely in an attempt to revive his career in mainstream movies, appearing in bit roles in crappy low-budget movies such as Skin Walker (2004) and Unseen Evil 2 (2004). He has also run a sports and movie memorabilia collectibles store with his father in Westlake Village, California since 1987.

Schwartz apparently likes to pretend that he is friends with sports celebrities. He posted pictures of himself with Barry Bonds and Hulk Hogan on his MySpace page. The caption for the Hogan picture indicates that Hogan is an "old friend." This, of course, begs the question - why is the Hulkster looking at Schwartz as though Schwartz is some kind of weirdo if Hogan really is an "old friend?"

At this point Schwartz's acting career is washed-up beyond all repair. He is a chubby and unattractive little shrimp and is becoming more and more obese every day, as one can clearly see in the pictures below. All of this makes Scott Schwartz one washed up celebrity!



*** Update - February 16, 2010 ***

I just discovered that Scott Schwartz was more involved in the porn business than I had initially realized. Not only did Schwartz act in porno movies, he was also an agent for porn stars. He wrote a letter to a porn website to discuss his dealing with a porn star named Anastasia Blue, who was a former client and had committed suicide years after he last represented her.

42 comments:

Anonymous said...

Eww...who'd want to watch that weird little Down's Syndrome face at the moment of climax..?!

Anonymous said...

you know how to pick'em Kurt. another gold star for you.

Anonymous said...

^^Indeed. I love your blog.

Ralphy said...

I bet he fucks that dog of his.

JewveBeenFramed said...

I'm renting all of those movies tonight!

I think he may have had a sexual relationship with the Hulkster which would explain why Hulk looks pissed off that he has come to harass him in public.

diamondcutter said...

talking about Christmas Story, whatever happened to Ralphie (Peter Billingsly)?

Movie Fan said...

I think that Ralphie is a producer now. He also had a small role in "The Break-Up" with Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston. He was in the scene at the bowling alley.

the French Ass Fucker said...

I hear Peter Billingsley is butt buddies with Vince Vaughn and because of this met Jon Favreau. The 2 have had a torrid love affair in which Peter wears the pink bunny suit as Jon is fucking his ass while Dustin Diamond comes in and Jon re-enacts the famous Screech scene from Made.

Anonymous said...

as horrific as this is to admit, I used to have a huge crush on him when he was in Kidco and The Toy......eewwwww he is freakishly dwarfish and ugly and now i hate the fact that I loved him as a kid. ewww ewww eww

Anonymous said...

holy shit i seen one of his porns and never knew it was him!and what the hell is wrong with you people? (this is mostly 4 the guys)if you could have sex with a hot juicy chic maybe even 2 or more & get paid u wouldnt?

JewveBeenFramed said...

I get paid to have sex with men and star in numerous videos. I'm a huge homo, just like most of the lads here. Why would we want to have sex with any woman?

saturn96 said...

fuzzy buskers

Anonymous said...

I have a porno called "Flash Point" starring Jenna Jameson, and if you watch side "B", extra features, the making of, you get a few quotes of Scotty dressed up as a firefighter. Unfortunately he does not appear in the movie, meaning the loser wound up on the cutting room floor of a porn flick.

Anonymous said...

Did you read his MySpace? He's very strict on autographs; none free. He's acting like he's this widely known A-Lister or something. Too bad he looks like a fucking lawn gnome and he was never much to begin with.

Anonymous said...

Actually, he seems to be acting like someone who desperately needs money - or at least loves it more than anything else... You can make a lot of fast money in porn, but it gets spent fast too, which is why people keep returning to porn for the fast money!

I wonder if his acting stint in The Toy had anything to do with him deciding to get into porn...?

What is it about black celeberaties and little white boys, anyway...

Anonymous said...

How could you fail to mention he was in "the toy" with the late great Richard Pryor. Later he became a toy himself

Ed said...

What a TUBBY butthole!

BALLS2011 said...

Whatever he may be doing know is his business how many of u can say you worked with the late great richard pryor u people r always judging u probably r jacking to one f his porno's now. I just got finish watching the toy and it made me google scott and this is what i find i bunch off losers and haters get a life and stop riding scott DICK!!!!!!!!!!

BALLS2011 said...

Whatever scott maybe doing now is his business. How many of u can say u worked with the late great Richard Pryor. Scott maybe washed up or whatever u want to call it but when it was his time to shine he did it well so for all u loser and haters get off Scott Schwartz DICK!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Scott couldn't perform in his porn with Julie Ashton. They should have paired Scott up with the sensational Serenity.

Anonymous said...

He should really appear on a crappy D-List reality tv show somewhere !!

burrows101 said...

scott is a great person , just because he lives a normal life , and not a hollywood life he is a loser ??? when you have as many acompblishments as scott , then you can be the first one to throw stones at him. judge a person by their character in life !!!! not in hollywood!!!!!

yuliapanella said...

Agreed balls2011
My brother knows ScoTt personally, and he's actually a decent guy, so he didn't turn out looking like a stud, so the fuck what?! Judgmental people are so damn prejudice >.< you guys have no lives if thats all you have to say about a former star that's actually trying to make a living
Though asking for money for autographs is a bit overrated, lame, pathetic, whatever you want to call it.

Wayne Frazer said...

Scott's a great guy -- sharp, funny and always surrounded by people who want to talk to him at the functions at which I see him.

In other words, just about everything every commenter here isn't.

oahu bounty man said...

you guys keep mentioning the surreal life as a place for washed up celebs. well vince neil was on it and hes not washed up. motley crue still sells out stadiums. and jordan knight was on it and is now enjoying a resurgance with his group new kids on the block. some of you need to get all your facts before you say anything.

Erick Scott said...

Hollywood sucks, and how it can destroy a person and push them into a life of shame is pathetic. We seen it too many times with child performers. Instead of using them for there own personal gain, develop transitional ways for them. Hollywood sucks!!!!!!!!!!! Damn Users!

Anonymous said...

Did Scotty Schwartz date porn star Houston? she mentions him in her book, did he just have a one nighter with her?

Robert W said...

Aaaaaah he actually knows those sports stars in the pictures he owns a sports autographs and movie memorabilia store in L.A ..... BAM !!!

Anonymous said...

Why are u guys being so mean. I bet you watched scott schwartz in movies when he was younger. So he gained a little weight thats what happends when men start to fill out and dont excersise. Hollywood can be cruel and its no guarantee u will be a star forever.

Anonymous said...

Why are you posting pictures of Chastity Bono & calling them Scott Schwartz??? Everybody knows that kid died when Ralphy shot his eye out... no wait, that's right; Richard Pryor thought he was a 4 foot tall talking bag of freebase cocaine & smoked him to death on the set of The Toy.

Anonymous said...

And this is what we call grown ups? I see why kids these days are messed up. Dang people no one controls there own growth. I don't agree with the turning to porn, but maybe transitioning into adulthood and still being small was hard for him. Im barely over 5 ft and short jokes and mean comments don't make people feel good. My children(3) are almost 6 ft and it is hard being teased by them. Get a life people. It's a shame how people find pleasure in others misfortune. Animals seems more compassionate than most of this bunch.

Anonymous said...

scott Schwartz is a fucking pussy. I almost bitch slapped him last weekend and he shit his pants!

Anonymous said...

I love the fact that someone with clearly zero ability to be successful I life decided to put their time and energy into setting up a site merely to badmouth people who at least tasted success in some way. What a joke. And the only bigger joke is some of the friggin comments which are written by people that have never met Scott or any other kid star and are hiding behind a keyboard in their moms basement. And " anonymous" from 10/28 please post your address and well see if a couple of Scotts Jersey friends can pay you a visit so you can tell them your tale in person...

Anonymous said...

Those who can, DO. Those who can't talk about those who do.
Scotty Schwartz, as far as I can tell, seems to be a decent and well liked person who runs a business and happens to be a child star who also did some adult movies where he got to bang hot chicks and probably has some damn interesting stories to tell because of it all. I met him on an appearance for Christmas Story and he was nice as can be.
And the point of the blog is what? So people like me will put someting positive, out there to balance the nasty, misinformed and negative? Well done . Mission accomplished. Consider that the world is ready full of enough ugly. Why add to it? Its not special. Try writing something inspiring, helpful, entertaining or positive. If you can. Because when you die...no one will care or remember your words. That is a cardinal sin if you're a REAL writer.

Anonymous said...

There's lots of mean on this page.

Anonymous said...

is scott gay?

Anonymous said...

I have a great friend that has had dealings with Scott Schwartz in real life and he is a chicken shit egotistical fool that disguises himself with manipulative kindness. Anyone on here having sympathy for a grown man who takes no responsibility because his ego is way to big for a fatass and a has been career he is living off of before his short lived porn career is just clearly not informed on the real Scott Schwartz. From one man to another this guy is a complete pussy that needs to grow the fuck up and stop playing with people to get a convenience factor that considers no one elses feeling but his own. Karma is a bitch Scott. Remember this man to man buddy, but then again you are not a man yet so good luck to you and one day you will understamd this. The day you grow the fuck up.

Anonymous said...

p.s. if you saw the people Scott has messed with, the answer is yes he must be gay

Anonymous said...

It must be galling to know that although this man may have peaked early, he accomplished more in his childhood than the blog creator/OP will in his entire life.

Anonymous said...

This dude looks like he's full on retarded!

Terry Mcgee said...

Here is a little known fact about Scotty! Scotty was Chris Burke's stunt double on "Life Goes On". Just like Chris, Scotty was paid in candy and toys!

Anonymous said...

Poor scotty