Sunday, May 04, 2008

Dustin Diamond (2008 Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp Appearance - Episode VII)

Episode VII - April 20, 2008

The seventh episode of Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp started with all of the contestants riding on a bus to the boot camp. After arriving at the boot camp, each of the contestants exited the bus and lined up in front of drill instructor Harvey Walden.


After the contestants were lined up, Harvey said to Dustin Diamond, "Dustin Diamond, surprised to see you here. Anything to say to your teammates since you walked out on them last week?" Diamond's only response was to pretend like nothing had happened last week, saying, "Uh, I hope you guys all lost a lot of weight." Tocarra Jones and Brian Dunkelman rolled their eyes as Diamond said this.


A side interview was subsequently shown where A.J. Benza said the following about Diamond:


"I think somewhere in the middle of the show people stopped caring about Dustin's journey. When a bunch of us started getting screwed up with, you know, the Dustin drama, it was look, like we're not gonna play in that drama no more. If you're gonna do it, you do it, but we have shit to do and work to get done and we're gonna do it."

Harvey then explained to everyone that this was "Hell Week," and that everyone was going to have to work hard while dealing with a sleep deficit. The red and blue teams subsequently went over to separate barracks to discuss their progress amongst themselves. In the red team's barracks, Tocarra asked Erin Moran what her strategy was to lose weight. Willie Aames joined Tocarra in questioning Erin Moran's weight loss progress, clearly annoying Erin Moran in the process.


In a later interview, Erin Moran showed that she didn't take the weight loss seriously, saying, "I don't want to lose more weight. If I lose three pounds instead of two [i.e., her weekly target weight loss], like that's really gonna make a difference ... to win? I don't think so ..."

Willie said to Erin Moran, "We worked our asses off. We had this thing wrapped up. They changed the teams ... ok. You've got a chance to win, but you're riding your chance to win on our work."


Willie also mentioned that he really wanted to win the team contest over Diamond's blue team. Erin Moran replied that winning wouldn't make a difference in her life. After listening to Erin Moran's answer, Willie said in a later interview, "I don't think I got through to Erin one bit. I lost any respect I had for Erin at that point."

The blue and red teams were then shown receiving instructions from Ant regarding the week's team fitness challenge. The fitness challenge was a reconnaissance mission - military supplies were deposited at eight locations through the rocky terrain of the boot camp and were to be brought back and placed on wooden platforms for each of the teams. The teams were given 2 1/2 hours to clear as many of the locations as possible.


The red team arrived as a location where each team had to dig out a massive tire that was partially buried in dirt and roll it back to the start line. The red team used shovels to dig out their tire and then decided to sabotage the blue team by throwing the shovels behind some trees before the blue team arrived at that particular location.


When the blue team arrived at the location with the tire, they were forced to dig it out with their hands, as there were no shovels available at that time. After digging out the tire, the blue team rolled it back toward the start line along with objects from other locations that had been cleared. At this moment, Diamond began his trademark complaining. Diamond bitched, "I'm so tired."


In a later interview, Tina Yothers said, "Dustin started whining right out of the gate. And he just really got under my skin. I just don't want to hear him anymore."

While walking up a hill on the rocky course, Diamond complained, "Oh man, I'm starting to hurt." Dunkelman tried to motivate Diamond, telling him to "suck it up."

After reaching the start line with objects from three locations and loading them onto their platform, Diamond pretended to be injured. Diamond uttered, "Ow, I just had a cramp in my leg." At this point in the episode, it became abundantly clear that Diamond was a 100% wimp, even weaker and more pathetic than his Screech character on Saved By The Bell ever was.


Sommore said in a later interview, "[A]ll of a sudden Dustin catches a charley horse. I don't want to just assume that he's faking. I don't want to do that."


Brian Dunkelman then began massaging Diamond's leg. Diamond appeared to enjoy Dunkelman's massage and I began to question whether Diamond had pretended to be injured to get out of the competition or whether he did so to get Dunkelman to give him a homoerotic massage. The former scenario is most likely the case, although it is not a 100% certainty.

A scene was later shown where Diamond was carrying more supplies to the start line and stopped because he got tired. Dunkelman yelled at Diamond again, saying, "We're almost there, Dustin. Don't you fucking quit on me. ... You guys gotta suck it up. You gotta. Come on Dustin, I'm in pain. Let's go, drag that fucking thing!"


In response, Diamond whined, "You guys walk so fast."

Near the end of the competition, both teams carried items furiously back to the start line. Tocarra tried to block the blue team's advance by moving right in front of them while holding a pole with canteens on it. This action infuriated Dunkelman, and Dunkelman and Tocarra exchanged words.


Finally, the fitness challenge ended and the red team was crowned the winning team, having clears 7 locations, versus 6 for the blue team. The end result seemed like total b.s. to team, seeing as how the red team had sabotaged the blue team by throwing away their shovels that they were to use to dig out the big tire.

After the result was announced, the blue team was asked to vote for the "Dead Weight" member. Diamond was apparently under the impression that everyone was going to vote for Tina Yothers because he had blisters on his feet and she offered to be the Dead Weight. However, Diamond's teammates were pissed at him for another pathetic performance and voted for him anyway.


About the vote, Diamond said in a later interview, "Tina said, everyone pick me as the Dead Weight because I don't have any blisters on my feet. I wrote Tina down because of that."

Sommore was also interviewed after the vote, saying, "Dustin's like, 'I thought we had a plan.' It wasn't my plan. When you stopped on that road and we had to wait on you, you were dead weight."

As the Dead Weight, Diamond was ordered to dig a big 3-foot deep hole. The hole appeared to be about the length and width of a grave.


While Diamond dug the hole, Erin Moran was getting her shoulder looked at; she had apparently injured it during the fitness challenge. The rest of the cast members were waiting in the barracks where they eat and were joking around about how pathetic Diamond and Erin Moran were on the show.

A.J. Benza said, "What [Erin] lacks in strength, she has in heart. That's what Dustin needs. He stops at the first pain."

Dunkelman chimed in, saying, "What [Dustin] lacks in physical ability, he makes up for with lack of desire and laziness." Everyone started laughing hysterically at Diamond's ineptitude at this point. While everyone was joking, Tocarra offered to trade Erin Moran back to the blue team for Dustin Diamond. Tocarra was apparently under the impression that the blue team was willing to make such an exchange, although nobody on the blue team seriously considered making the trade.


Diamond eventually returned to the boot camp after spending more than two hours digging the hole. Tocarra took Diamond aside and told him that everyone joked about him while he was gone and that his team offered to trade him for Erin Moran. Diamond was clearly hurt when Tocarra told him that people were joking about him. In a later interview, Diamond said, "You know what hurts me a bit is that my team turned on me and that's just not very strategic thinking."


Tocarra then called a team meeting of all of the cast members, and said that she wanted to go through the Diamond - Erin Moran trade. At this point, everyone of the blue team refused the trade and said that they wanted to keep Diamond.


Erin Moran was very upset when the proposed trade was announced. In a subsequent interview, she said, "Why mess with a person that likes you and is nice and just wants to be positive and happy? Why do that? It's just pointless and it's rude and it's very disrespectful. There's no respect."

The cast members later went back to their barracks to sleep and were awoken at midnight by Harvey. Everyone walked outside and carried flashlights to a location near the bottom of a steep hill. The teams were instructed to each push a large tire up the steep hill. The first team to the top would get to sleep in the next morning and skip that day's early morning exercises.



Diamond's blue team had a major advantage in the competition because Erin Moran was injured and couldn't push her team's tire, effectively giving the blue team a 4-3 advantage. Shortly after the start, Diamond began complaining that he was going to throw up and started walking next to his teammates without helping push his team's tire up the hill.

About Diamond, Sommore later said, "We were way ahead of [the red team], but Dustin is like walking next to us and I'm like, 'Get your ass in here and get some of this somewhere.'"


Dunkelman and Diamond had the following exchange:


"Dunkelman: Dustin, get the fuck up here!
Diamond: I'm gonna puke.
Dunkelman: I don't care. Then puke and then get up here. I'm sick of fucking doing twice the work! Let's go!"

Everyone on the blue team started yelling at Diamond to not give up for once. The motivation apparently helped, as the blue team ended up winning the event and got to sleep in the next morning. After finishing the race, everyone went back to their barracks for more sleep.

At 6:30 AM, Harvey woke everyone up and the red team was taken to an obstacle course. Yothers joined the red team to get some additional exercise, impressing Willie Aames. The daily exercise drill was to flip big tires across the course, throw medicine balls, pull a sled with another cast member sitting on it, put rocks into a ditch to make a bridge, and then perform the course in reverse.


Finally, the weigh-in for the week was shown. Diamond stepped on the scale and it was revealed that he had lost 4 pounds and was now down to a total body weight of 197 lbs, a loss of 20 lbs from the start of the show. Dr. Ian Smith congratulated Diamond on his weight loss and had the following conversation with Diamond:


"Dr. Ian Smith: Dustin, I've got to say that I think that you and I have had a great relationship this show. So I have to ask you a question - why do you go and come back, go and come back? Why do you go through the theatrics?

Diamond: See, I see it as avoiding the theatrics. I mean, if things start getting heated, or aggressive or whatever, I'd just, I'd rather be away from it.

Dr. Ian Smith: But disagreements will happen. We're all human beings. We all have very strong opinions and it just seems like - it just makes you look like, 'Oh my goodness - he's quitting again. Give me ... what else is new?'

Diamond: Well, I never quit. I'm not quitting, I'm here for the long haul."



After Diamond stepped off the scale, a picture of Diamond was shown which indicated his body weight % and body fat % lost during the show. The picture indicated that although Diamond had lost 20 lbs up to this point, or 9.2% of his initial body weight, he had only lost 1.9% of his body fat. Amazingly, this means that Diamond's body fat % has actually increased over the first seven weeks of the show!

In the first episode, Diamond weighed in at 217 lbs and had a measured body fat % of 27%. This means that he carried about 58.59 lbs of fat and 158.41 lbs of non-fat material. As of the seventh episode, he had lost just 1.9% of his body fat. This means that he carried about 57.478 lbs of fat (i.e., ((1-.019) * 58.59). 57.478 lbs of fat / 197 lbs of total weight = a body fat % of about 29.2 %!

Through the first seven weeks, he lost about 1.11 lbs of fat and 18.89 lbs of non-fat body weight. That can't all be water loss, so he must have lost a lot of muscle - he has to have been starving himself. It's really shocking to me that Dr. Ian Smith would actually praise Diamond for losing so much weight when barely 5% of the weight that Diamond lost was body fat. It's an extremely unhealthy way to lose weight and I can practically guarantee that Diamond will be even fatter within a year.

Getting back to the show, Brian Dunkelman was weighed after Diamond. Dunkelman was some weight and then revealed that he was upset about the way he was viewed after the first season of American Idol, during which he had been a co-host. Dunkelman said that he wasn't fired, but that he quit because he didn't like the way that the kids were treated on the show. He also said that choosing to not return for the second season was the biggest mistake he had ever made in his entire life.

Finally, Erin Moran got on the scale. Erin had gained one pound for the week and after seven weeks had only lost four of the eight pounds that she was supposed to lose during the course of the show. Dr. Ian Smith asked her why she was even on the show and Erin replied that she's on the show for the money.


Stacey Kaiser said that Erin's performance was horrible and that if she were handing out the checks, she wouldn't pay Erin. Stacey Kaiser also asked Erin why she didn't want the benefit of the health advice offered on the show. Erin clearly did not want to talk to Stacey Kaiser at this time and Ant chimed in, saying that Erin was being disrespectful to Stacey Kaiser. Finally, Erin said the following:


"It's not that I don't want [the benefits], Stacey. I do want them. At this time and juncture in my life, I'm doing it for the money, ok? It's not like I'm totally ignoring it and not doing anything. This is the best I've done in my whole life."

The red team's captain, Tocarra, looked very upset at Erin's lack of weight loss progress and overall dismissive attitude when Erin was on the scale. FYI, despite having lost only 4 lbs, or 3.1% of her overall body weight, Erin had actually lost a larger % of her body fat than Diamond! Erin was shown to have lost 2.9% of her body fat, a full percentage point more than Diamond.



**Be sure to check out my other Dustin Diamond entries:
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode I
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode II
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode III
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode IV
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode V
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode VI

Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode VIII
 
Dustin Diamond - (2007 Celebrity Fit Club Appearance)
Dustin Diamond - The Early Years
Dustin Diamond (2000-Present)

Saturday, April 26, 2008

Dustin Diamond (2008 Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp Appearance - Episode VI)

Episode VI - April 13, 2008

The sixth episode of Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp began with all of the contestants riding on a bus to the boot camp. The contestants were not looking forward to the day's activities, as the weather was cold and rainy. After arriving at the boot camp, the contestants lined up, as usual. Drill instructor Harvey Walden decided to mix things up by shaking up the teams. Dustin Diamond and Tina Yothers were moved to the blue team and A.J. Benza and Erin Moran were moved to the red team.


Tocarra Jones was upset about the shake-up, as her red team had been substantially ahead of the blue team in terms of overall weight loss. The blue team was also nervous about receiving Diamond, who had come to be viewed as a pain in the ass. About receiving Diamond, Sommore said, "I was really nervous. I knew Dustin was going to be a little bit irritable." Brian Dunkelman was also peeved, saying, "I was disappointed we got Dustin. My first thought was, 'oh shit,' because he kind of pissed me off last week [when he was drunk after playing pool and shot his mouth off]."

The challenge of the day required each team to move military supplies, such as tires, metal barrels, and wooden boxes, from one side of a valley onto a military truck on the other side. The team moving the heaviest amount of military supplies within an hour would win the challenge.

Diamond's new blue team started out strong, working together as a team and quickly captured a large lead. The red team, on the other hand, was very disorganized. A.J. Benza was throwing military supplies around like a lunatic, rolling heavy metal barrels down the valley without regard to the safety of the people standing near the bottom. At 20 minutes into the challenge, Diamond's blue team was comfortably ahead, having moved 940 lbs versus 570 lbs for the red team.



At one point, the blue team's lead seemed insurmountable. However, Diamond's out of shape and lazy ass quickly began loafing around. Diamond started whining that the competition was too hard, saying, "I can't breathe." Brian Dunkelman tried to motivate Diamond, saying, "Let's go." Diamond's reply was simply, "That still doesn't change the physical aspect of my lung capacity."


Brian Dunkelman was upset with Diamond's pathetic display, saying:

"Dustin was afraid he was gonna pass out. I don't know if Dustin does the best that he can. There's no way to really know that. If the fact that he's being outperformed by a woman who just had a baby 2 1/2 months ago isn't motivation enough, what the hell am I gonna do?"

Sommore was annoyed with Diamond's loafing, saying to Dunkelman, "Please motivate Dustin."

Yothers was also ticked off at Diamond's laziness. She said, "The challenge took everything out of me, but we were doing really well. We really had momentum. We were communicating. We were smoking the red team and then Dustin started falling apart."

About his pathetic performance, Diamond said, "I didn't forget that we were in a fucking race. I just got tired and need to stop and take a breath. I got winded. You know, I was dizzy ... but I never quit."

With 15 minutes remaining in the competition, Diamond's blue team was still in the lead, but the gap had narrowed substantially. The blue team was slightly ahead, having moved 3310 lbs versus 3005 lbs for the red team. At this point, Diamond sat down to rest like a total wuss while his teammates continued to move supplies as quickly as they could. Diamond was clearly dead weight on his team and was quickly destroying their previous lead.

By the time the challenge ended, the red team caught up to the blue team and actually won the competition. Diamond's team looked exhausted and was undoubtedly upset at Diamond for his crappy performance.

After the winning team was announced, Ant asked the blue team members to select the "Dead Weight" for the week. Diamond apparently assumed that he would help out Tina if she were voted as the Dead Weight and that his team members would help him if he was voted as the Dead Weight. Diamond voted for Tina, saying, "I [voted for] Tina 'cause I figure whether she does or not, I'll be with her."

Diamond was surprised and upset when everyone rightfully voted him as the Dead Weight. About the vote, an unhappy Diamond blamed the challenge loss on his teammates who, unlike him, hadn't sat down to rest during the challenge. Diamond said,

"You know what hurts me a bit is that in the beginning it was like, 'Well everyone tried their best, we don't think there was a dead weight.' Now it's, 'Oh Dustin was the dead weight.' But here's what's funny - even though I was dragging a little bit, I wasn't dragging so much to hold anyone back."

As Dead Weight, Diamond was ordered to wash down and scrub the boot camp's bus with cleaning products even though it was raining at this time. Diamond's was unhappy with his assigned task and the fact that his teammates didn't help him, saying, "Washing the bus - that was bullshit. It was pouring rain. Why do you want me to wash a bus while it's pouring rain?"

Diamond also vented in a subsequent interview, saying,


"I get my team through things. I encourage them. I, you know, I help them through it. I help them when they're down ... but you know what, none of the other cast members seem to want to really help me, the D-man. At some point, I will say, 'Fuck it.' Team will get pissed and well, you know what? Welcome to Hollywood - disappointment abounds."

After Diamond finally finished washing the bus, everyone changed and drove in the bus to a local bar where there was an open-mic night. Erin Moran got really drunk and started dancing like a stripper in front of everyone, to the surprise of her cast-mates.

Tina Yothers later got up on the stage and sang a song, to the delight of the other cast members, who seemed to be genuinely impressed by her vocal abilities. Next, Erin Moran went on the stage and swung a hula hoop around her waist, re-enacting a scene from Happy Days, her claim to fame. Tocarra then got up and upstaged Erin Moran by swinging four hula hoops around her waist. Erin Moran was jealous and upset with Tocarra for upstaging her, as became evident on the bus ride back to the boot camp.

Erin was being really loud and obnoxious on the bus ride, saying that she hated the show and slapping her butt. She claimed to know lines from "The Vagina Monologues" and then said she could recite the lines. Erin subsequently pretended to have an orgasm on the bus, to the annoyance of her teammates. It was really creepy. Dunkelman got a disgusted look on his face and A.J. Benza pretended to hide behind a seat. Tina Yothers chimed in, saying, "I threw up a little bit in my mouth."



When the bus arrived back at the camp, Erin was emotional and wandered off into the woods, saying she hated the show. The other cast members were concerned because it was nighttime and raining and went looking for her. Diamond was shown carrying a flashlight while looking for her. Diamond looked like a complete moron and appeared to be looking for her under rocks and in puddles while holding his flashlight.

Erin eventually made it back to her barracks and said that she had gone into the woods to make a phone call. Diamond eventually found her in the women's barracks and wanted to make sure she was ok. Diamond looked funny as he stood in her barracks - his Jew-fro had soaked up a lot of rain and looked shiny.




Finally, everyone went to bed to prepare for the next day's events. Harvey woke up the contestants the next morning for a workout with the WWE Divas, i.e., female wrestlers. The workout consisted of everyone jumping on trampolines, doing push-ups, crunches, etc. After just a few minutes of exercise, Diamond started slacking off. One of the hot little Divas had the following conversation with Diamond:

"WWE Diva: Come on, you're lagging Dustin, come on.

Diamond: It's 'cause I'm tired and I drank last night.

WWE Diva: Well, that's not our fault.

Diamond: I need to fucking breathe, man."



When questioned by Harvey about his slow performance, Diamond claimed that he couldn't move quickly because the ground was wet and he had almost slipped. One of the WWE Divas was clearly annoyed with Diamond's pathetic display and jokingly said, "Don't make me body slam you, Dustin." Harvey chimed and said in jest, "I'll pay you to do that."



Diamond was really upset with Harvey's joking offer. Diamond whined in a later interview,

"Pay someone to hit me? 'I'll pay you to hit him??' That's a threat of assault. I'm not gonna let myself keep being targeted, 'cause I'm gonna start targeting. People better start watching their asses. I'm calling my manager whose sole purpose is to look out for my safety, well-being, and fair treatment."

After the session with the WWE divas, the contestants returned to their barracks. Once back at his barracks, Diamond complained to Willie Aames about what Harvey had said. Diamond also bragged that he was going to get Harvey fired. Diamond acted like he was a tough guy and called his manager behind Harvey's back to complain.

The weigh-in occurred during the final session of the episode. During the weigh-ins for Tina Yothers and Brian Dunkelman, Diamond's poor performance during the previous day's challenge event was discussed with Harvey. I have no doubt that these discussions annoyed Diamond.

When it was Diamond's turn on the scale, it was revealed that he had not lost any weight since the previous episode - he was stuck at 201 lbs. As Diamond stood on the scale, the following exchange took place between Diamond, Stacey Kaiser, and Harvey:

"Stacey: So I was surprised that when the Divas made a comment this morning,and then when Harvey made a joke, you then filed a complaint. Why not go directly to the source if you have an issue with him?

Diamond: This morning I felt attacked, basically.


Harvey: That is the way I motivate. If you've got a problem with it, why did you come here? Personally, I don't freaking like you, but I'm just as hard on the rest of them when they're not putting out as I am on you. And you know what pisses me off is you've gotta keep back-dooring me and calling all these God-damn knuckleheads all over the freaking world and I gotta hear about it last. If you've got a freaking problem, you come to me. You always half-step. This morning you were God-damn half-stepping again. It took the freaking Divas 20 minutes to figure it out. And as soon as they said something to you, you freaking said, 'Ok, Harvey told you to pick on me.' Where the hell did that freaking come from? what makes you think I'm telling somebody to God-damn ambush you?

Diamond: There's a difference between motivating and federal crime. You can't say certain things.

Harvey: Dustin, kiss my ass with your federal crime bullshit! If you think I'm gonna let you God-damn censor the way I've been doing business for over 20-something years, you can kiss my yellow fit ass. Your target weight loss for the next weight-in is 5 freaking pounds, Dustin. If you don't like it, go freaking home! I was the one that freaking didn't believe in your ass from day one! I gave you a God-damn fair shot and you fucking pissed on it!"


Looking defeated, Diamond walked off the stage and out of the room while Harvey was yelling at him. After he was gone, A.J. Benza celebrated, saying "Hoo-rah!" Willie Aames and A.J. Benza also told Harvey they would defend him if Diamond brought any claims against him.


Once outside, Diamond vented his frustrations. Diamond said, "It's a targeted, willful attack. Oh no, I look foolish for standing up for myself." Diamond also said that Harvey was a dangerous person.

Diamond was also upset that none of the other cast members defended him during his weigh-in or walked outside to comfort him. Diamond said,

"Where are they? I would have come out. People could have said in there, 'that wasn't right, you shouldn't have gotten on him like that.' I don't know if he's bipolar or if he hates Jews that much or if he just has war battle fatigue or whatever you call it. Harvey is dangerous no matter what anyone else says, I don't care. He is bloodlust from war, bloodlust from combat."



**Be sure to check out my other Dustin Diamond entries:
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode I
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode II
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode III
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode IV
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode V
Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode VII

Dustin Diamond - Celebrity Fit Club: Boot Camp - Episode VIII

Dustin Diamond - (2007 Celebrity Fit Club Appearance)
Dustin Diamond - The Early Years
Dustin Diamond (2000-Present)